Thursday, November 17, 2016

Loneliness (page 4)

A rise in Loneliness:

   Loneliness is the loss of a social network. When using popular internet search engines to find out about this, they will give results showing that this phenomenon has greatly increased over the years. One recent 2016 study had shown that loneliness creates a kind of "fight or flight" response by which it has revealed to be the indirect casuality (specifically, a physiochemical casuality) of the release of a protein that increases blood clotting which can contribute to a stroke etc. Among so many other things, lack of sleep can also create a stress reaction that is intense enough to keep the sleep deprived person more awake for a certain period of time. Decreased immune function can also happen if enough stress hormones are released. (These bodily states are based on a approx. 24 hour cycle by which the body normally adjusts its metabolic and neurological activity through certain periods of time.)

 Recent research suggest that social networking has, in general, decreased meaningful interactions - a lack of intimate connections. Your probably thinking: "is that all there is?". On the one hand, certain phenomenon related to our culture today should carry some significance. On the other hand, however, there is a much more broader view of phenomenon which dates back to aprox. the 1950's which should relate to many relevant factors which pinpoints approximately how our society has been acclimated to certain worldviews.
                                                                                    (Considering the facts)


-Around 1955, amphetamine and methamphetamines gained popularity. They were utilitarian drugs sold in college campuses. By the 1960's, production of tablets for civilian use was in the billions per year.

-In his book, Dr. Seligman (Martin Seligman) cites data that indicates that the incidence of depression in the US has increased ten-fold since 1960.


                                                                                    (What does this mean?)


  Some of these conditions of the world which I am writing about are the result of peoples natural inclination to some of the ideas inherent in individualism. Individualism could mean to other people and to the reader this: "liberated secularist", equality, free-thinking, and self-autonomy. On the other hand, it may also mean competitive self-interest(a particular phenomenon relating to behavior).

 The significant ideas to gather from this information in regard to the conditions created that lead up to certain phenomenon or that, actually, was also an outgrowth of a particular phenomenon, is that the inherent customs and ideologies of American culture has its interconnection with economics, technology (in this case, I'm referring to the popularization of mind altering substances that are created in laboratories) , and politics.

 I'll reveal again in this material: My intuition tells me that its inaccurate to simply blame social media or smartphones on the conditions that take place in this world - as in this 21st century rise in loneliness. Its more accurate to trace back the outgrowth of phenomenon brought about by technology and politics (revealed, briefly, in the facts I just gave in this material) which approximately dates back to significant manifestations in the 1950's etc. In general, these materializations of certain events - the recorded conditions within a period of time in history should give an indication of how things had progressed throughout the years. Specifically, it should lead us into trying to understand how peoples lives have been affected by American ideological and technological developments throughout a period of time.
 

 Referring to one of the facts gathered in this material that relates to the conditions of the times of 1955 and the decade that followed, I assume that certain conditions created could also be because of lack of knowledge - they could be caused by many different factors but, in regard to my writing earlier in this material, what does remain as a very basic conclusion to gather from this is that people had quickly accepted the claims made by their friends and the media - specifically, that certain amphetamine substances (advertised) read as "increased energy", "utilitarian drug", "weight loss", "antidepressant". These ideas are related to ideologies of individualistic self-interests - as the historical fact demonstrates, these were the conditions of the world (a loss of meaningful relationships, a booming economy, narcissism, keeping up with the joneses) created by those ideologies (as in based on self-interest and materialistic gain) and that's how, commonly, people make decisions if they were affected by those particular conditions of the world. (Based on the phenomenon of the 1955 time period, I could gather that the reason for the spread of individualistic lifestyles is significant to keep in mind - this reason is about the allure of psychoactive substances - I infer that they have a powerful control over ones conscience and reasoning. Its significant to understand this because of that its been demonstrated that certain conditions create the circumstances for certain mind altering substances to be more accepted - that's something that we can learn from. The only thing left to question, I suppose, is this question "how insensitive are we to be to it if this is an expected consequence of our nations ideologies and technology"?)

  Now your probably thinking, "Oh, so I'm stuck in some kind of underworld of the 21st century?". That's not really what I mean. Social networking can enhance your connections with people but only if you think that you really can find meaningful connections. (The rest of the time, my intuition tells me that real physical connections can still just as easily erode as online ones if one keeps in contact with Facebook or some other smartphone app in the midst of them.)

 Of course, some people see freedom in living alone. The number of people living alone has increased since the year 2000 and has greatly increased for men since 1970. Choosing to live by yourself is not a problem. Being forced to be alone, having a hard time finding people that you have anything in common with, being around people that are too busy because they are taking care of their families and you don't have one to take care of, and "the like" is a totally different story.

-  "(Think about the sociopathic kids who shot other kids in Red Lake, Minnesota; at Northern Illinois University; at Virginia Tech—what do they have in common? They were living in isolated places.)"

 So what is going to help? You might imagine that a big city could foster feelings of loneliness - its crowded, uncomfortable, and there's too much noise and its busy. Perhaps not. Use an internet search engine and find out about the benefits of living alone in a big city. There's more people living by themselves in a big city. Perhaps it has something to do with finding the job that you want there. However, living alone in places where other people do is the way to do it. Perhaps one could live near a vacation spot because, usually, with its amenities, it helps. (Use this map to find out which places have this characteristic):

https://public.tableau.com/profile/tim.henderson#!/vizhome/Livingalone/Dashboard4

Remaining connected and intimate:

- "about 40 to 50 percent of married couples in the United States divorce. The divorce rate for subsequent marriages is even higher." Adapted from the Encyclopedia of Psychology.

- eharmony Neil Clark Warren “Being in a bad relationship is a million times worse than having no relationship at all".

- "In a recent study conducted by Paula England, a professor of sociology at NYU and president of the American Sociological Association, about 90 percent of both male and female college students reported that they wanted to get married"

  On the one hand, there is advice on the internet that tells us that we shouldn't validate our worth based on dates and marriages. On the other hand, if you intuit that sex plays an irresistible role (in most people) in the feelings of intimacy, your probably right. Studies have been done for people that have had sex - even having sex with friends. Depending on who you are and how you do things, studies have shown that sex can, sometimes, enhance the friendship. Clearly, sex plays a role in marriages but without having too much sex - once a week sex is the moderate amount.



 In contrast to decades ago, as when America was characterized as a Christian nation, this nation is becoming less under its influence. (The most tantalizing hope for our freedom, as an example, is to ban the compulsory rights of the conversion therapy programs.). In those days, most of the things taught in school conformed to the popularity of the ideas that come from Christianity. Abstinence-only programs that teach sexuality are among them. What belongs in the public educational institutions such as the "moral guidance" given by the sexual abstinance classes or the classes that teach evolution are still in debate today. However, the influence of these old systems are becoming less popular.

 Popular opinion is changing in regard to this abstinence-only heterosexual ideal. "By emphasizing marriage as the expected standard, programs also exclude gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and questioning youth and ignore their needs." Its no question that those religious people saying that the things taught meet a standard, which relates only to marriage and having children, is a kind of favoritism of religion. The fact that people have had a difficult time changing these supplied unfounded ideals of a belief system in the public schools reveals conservative Christianity as coercive and discriminatory.

- Mike Huckabee says "expecting Christians to accept same-sex marriage is "like asking someone who's Jewish to start serving bacon-wrapped shrimp in their deli."

 Perhaps part of the reason why kids are confused about satisfying intimate relationships is because of that orthodox religion teaches that "the nuclear family is the foundation of society.". The bible portrays an important role that the design of the male and female body intends. Generally, it seems that Christians don't find much of any meaning to "live for oneself" and then, consequently, "avoid" marriage.
 

  In regard to an opinion of the same-sex attraction, does your inquisitiveness come active and get you to ask "Why can't they find happiness elsewhere?". Its not impossible but consider the following:

The bible can show that human beings are usually bodily, motivated by sexuality, and are usually passionate about any kind of sex by nature. Perhaps our knowledge of the surveys and statistics done in the research community of psychology on sexual relations can demonstrate this as well (not to prove the trustworthy of the bible, though!). The bible gives a very clear, concise, and emphatic message about sex since the principles of it is in the begging of the scriptures which has its title of "Genesis" and, in fact, after that, an entire book of the bible is actually dedicated to the health of sexual relations: "Song of Solomon". (Take heed of the fact that I never even read "Song of Solomon" but I know what its about and that's all that I needed to know)

 Now we have some facts to support the conclusion that peoples sexuality is source of a lot of temptation - that its a contributing factor to a lot of conflict in the world. Human beings face many challenges without participating in the dating and sex scene even if they don't care much for sex and dating - the challenges relate to loneliness. Some people even feel coerced to be in a "male-female complementary bible based" relationship because that its not a "weak tie", of course. I suppose that this is why the following had gained popularity: (Exodus International) "Exodus had 83 chapters in 34 states. Its president, Alan Chambers, claimed in 2004 that he knew “tens of thousands of people who have successfully changed their sexual orientation.”

 With this in mind, sex, in regard to same-sex attraction or something else unrelated to reproduction, is now revealed as something that "one struggles with" if they think that it goes against their religious moral convictions. I have found out that even people whom are gay and do not think that there is anything wrong with their "intimate pursuits", when I was researching what was said about the PrEP anti-HIV pill, gay people had admitted that its influence to over-indulge in sexual encounters goes against the common moral convictions of the gay community. In this case, the "temptation" in this community is "too much sex" in contrast to the mere "desire to have sex" found in the other group of people. This was why the PrEP drug was discussed in the article with a little censor and admonishment.

 Decades ago, sexual relationships were more about survival - someone needed to support you financially etc. Perhaps for this reason, people did not have much time to wonder about who they were compatible with and perhaps the focus was on taking care of the children which increased the element of purpose in their marriage. The woman in the marriage may have stayed home to take care of the kids. Usually, people are strongly influenced by either economics or religious backgrounds. What else to look for in that time period which influenced peoples decision making is not known to me right now. Find out about the relationships between economics and other phenomenon such as commuter relationships, divorce, child abuse, domestic abuse, and hate crimes on an internet search engine and you can validate easily what I am saying.

 In regard to what I wrote earlier about the nature of relationships of the past, perhaps part of the confusion caused by our lack of knowledge about meaningful connections could be because of that, generally, some of us were raised by parents whom were influenced by the problems and ignorance that their parents had, stemming from the problems and ignorance that influenced their generation.

 Therefore, to give an example of the conditions in the world and the challenges that certain people face because of those conditions: in the midst of people getting married to "fill in the void" and then take care of children, we can find evidence that then they have little time to hang out with friends. If you are not caring about dates or sex, a lot of people around you may, confusingly, match that opposite scenario - in fact, to an overwhelming degree, most people around you may be dating, searching for a date, or are married. For people that do not date and are affected by many conditions around them that I have not mentioned but including some conditions that I have mentioned, those conditions create feelings of loneliness. It may even influence us to feel like we are not participating in the norms of goal-setting around us.

 Sub-urban areas are popular for raising kids. If your child-oriented, how much time do you have to spend with friends? Usually, very little. For married child-raising-couples, since most of their time is devoted to their kids, even their marriages can, and influenced by other harmful factors, get harmed by the hindering that it has on the gradual attention that is needed towards each of them in order to find some kind of intimate "stability".

http://health.usnews.com/health-news/blogs/on-parenting/2009/04/13/having-children-adds-stress-to-marriage:

-  "90 percent of couples say the quality of their relationship declined after their first child was born"

 In summary, for this section of information on intimate relationships and loneliness, as to interpret a basic conclusion of the divorce rate, perhaps this shows that its not real easy to find people that one is compatible with for meaningful connection. I suppose that just as there is impaired rapport in a marriage or a date, without referring to prejudices of how the opposite sex contrasts in mindset with the other, perhaps people that form "weak ties" could be represented by that statistic. Since loneliness is interconnected with divorce, its a basic conclusion to assume that there's a high level of emphasis on peoples interaction to be romantic in order for it to be a "stronger tie".

   In combination with so many other things, loneliness has its contributing factors and seems to me like a very real and devastating condition of the world. Its now known by the reader that parents whom have kids could sometimes be lonely. Though, I wouldn't expect the statistic on this to show it to be high on the continuum. Parents whom had kids and that their kids are busy doing their own thing - "they've got their own life going" - these are the empty nesters and they have a high rate of loneliness. I suppose this plays a role in loneliness for the elderly.


The conditions of the world (summarizing most of the essentials of my discussion on generation "I"):

As of now, the basic facts have been given out within the first pages and then also this much later written material that comes after it. The phenomenon that we are dealing with in this world (I'm talking about the psychological phenomenon of peoples mindsets and feelings) is the existence of certain conditions which may have their parallels to similar events in history - these unusual conditions are created by the politics of peoples ideologies or religious beliefs, the marketing campaigns exaggerating the claims of their product, economic events which can play a role in peoples interaction with their families, (disinformation / mind-altering drugs etc) technological developments that appeal to our emotions - ones that parallel in principle to advertising which can create harmful distractions for us etc, and technological developments and ideologies that play a role in our perceptions of social networks such as Facebook and dating apps.

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